Change your mindset or change your role

Last month I wrote an article on the cost of perfectionism that must have hit home as it generated quite a bit of response from my readers. If that was you, thanks!  Letting go of my need to be right, is part and parcel of my thought leadership around embracing your inner expert.  If you've seen me speak or are part of my mentoring programs then you know all about that.

One of my favourite pieces of positive feedback thanked me for my regularly delivered “truth bombs”.  I loved the term so much I’m now motivated to deliver even pithier ones!  So here goes.

But I was disappointed as that particular article also received the highest number of unsubscribes I’ve had since I started – and I had to deal with my hurt ego.  


One of the things when going out in business on your own (and some of my clients are) is identifying who is your ideal target market. Perhaps in the first few years it’s tempting to try and be all things to all people, however there is a down side to this approach. When someone who is in fact not your ideal client rejects you, it seems to hurt even more, because you’ve already jumped through all sorts of hoops and turned yourself inside out trying to win the business.   Whereas the clients who are your ideal fit are attracted to your authentic voice; there is a mutual attraction, they are open to the ideas and solutions you propose and it’s easy. A win win for both. 

It's just like dating

In fact, it’s a lot like dating.   I remember years ago my younger sister who was/is far wiser than me in many things, gave me some tough but valid advice.

“Never date someone who’s not your ideal, because when they drop you, it hurts so much more!” 

Thanks sis! 

And yet when you finally find your ideal partner - it's oh so easy and you wonder why you bothered with all those Mr/Ms Not So Rights.

And enough about me, let's get back to you.

The perfect role?

So sometimes we take on roles that are not perfect or ideal to start with - then massage them, work hard in them and try and polish the role into shape.  Then when the going gets tough with possible negative workplace culture issues, redundancies or even a personality clash with a boss or peer, we feel incredibly hurt yet (wait for it) .......... hang around even longer and try and make it work.

My take? When the role is right, it doesn't really feel like work. You are focused, you deliver results, you are happy and you enjoy it so much that you can't wait to get back in there on Monday morning.  Life's too short to be trying to fit a square peg in a round hole, and quite possibly the feeling is mutual.

Stuck in a rut?

So if you’re stuck in a rut, or you find yourself in a role that’s not your “perfect fit” -  instead of being passive and waiting for something else to come along, or perhaps working even harder because you “should be able to make this work", perhaps it’s time to take a different approach.

  1. Carve out some quiet reflective time,
  2. Work out what’s important to you about work,
  3. Identify the drivers that keep you stuck in a role that isn’t ideal,
  4. Ask yourself - "how much is enough?"
  5. Then do something about it - change your mindset, or change your role - the choice is yours.
“I wished I stayed in that mediocre role for longer” - said no-one ever!

Vive la révolution! #ambitionrevolution #lookoutCsuitehereshecomes #feminineambition

  •  I am the creator of The Ambition Revolution – the science and art of amping smart and savvy.
  • I mentor busy professionals to ensure they remain strategic, agile and focused on the bigger game.
  • I also work with organisations who are trying to increase the profile of women in leadership, but struggling to do so



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